Dark Bilious Vapors

But how could I deny that I possess these hands and this body, and withal escape being classed with persons in a state of insanity, whose brains are so disordered and clouded by dark bilious vapors....
--Rene Descartes, Meditations on First Philosophy: Meditation I

Home » Archives » July 2005 » From the Practical Moral Theology Department....

[« What's in a Name...] [Thought for the Day: »]

07/17/2005: From the Practical Moral Theology Department....


I've confessed in this space that I have done a bit of online dating, and I'm still occasionally "meeting" people online, mostly as chat friends vice face to face. So far it's amounted to a bit of harmless fun, a few good dates, and even fewer relationships of any length. But a recent conversation with a chat friend has me wrapping my mind around a conundrum that's occupied my attention several times in my life (in other words, this isn't the first time I've become aware of a situation like this one).

Recently I've had a few conversations with a new online friend who lives a bit aways from me (defined as farther than a block's radius, but closer than 600 miles). Of course, when one is my age, one of the first things that gets discussed is children, as in how many does your new acquaintance have and how many live with her? That part of the discussion led to this exchange:

FRIEND: My eldest [mid-20's and in the service at this time --LRC] is my ex-husband's. My youngest is 8, and his father wants NOTHING to do with him, though he does send support and pays for doctor's and dental bills, so I guess I don't have much to complain of.
ME: Well, you're lucky there; there are a lot of deadbeat dads out there who try to skip out completely on support.
FRIEND: Yeah. We were engaged when I got pregnant. Once he learned that my son was on the way he decided he didn't want to be a father at his age, so he broke the engagement.
ME: That's sad. Well, I can understand; I really don't want to be a father again at my age. I don't really look forward to putting a kid through college in my mid-to-late 60's. But you know, if he didn't want to be a father, there
are things that he could do to prevent that.
FRIEND: Well, he's Catholic....
A little later in the conversation, I learned that after my new chat friend and her fiance had broken the engagement, she then learned that he was still married. Granted, he was separated pending divorce, but the divorce wasn't final, and he had never told her about that....

Well, I'm sure you see the part that I find so puzzling.... We have a guy here who, apparently, has no great qualms about having sexual intercourse with a woman not his wife, and who in the eyes of the Church is, quite probably committing adultery (we don't know for sure, because my friend didn't tell me whether her paramour was validly married "in the Church" or not). But he refuses to use contraception because "he's Catholic", the implication of her statement being that he felt it was morally wrong for him to use contraception. More wrong than committing fornication/adultery.

Well, maybe my morals have become a bit perverted, but I was raised Catholic, and I didn't do too badly at four years of Catholic grade school religion class, four years of Catholic CCD/PSR (PSR = "Parish School of Religion"; i.e., Catholic "Sunday School" for those of us who were attending public school at the time), and four years of Catholic high school. And along the way, during those 12 years of Catholic religious education I got the distinct impression that the Church rather heavily condemned having sex with a person you weren't married to--not to mention that it wasn't at all better (and probably, in fact a good deal worse) to be having sex with someone not your spouse when in fact you have a spouse out there!

So we have a guy out there who's thinking, "Fornication/adultery? Not a biggie. But contraception? Good God, I can't do that! I'm Catholic! The Church would never forgive me!"

Is it just me, or do any of you see the disconnect?

So I suppose I'm just opening this up to the readership. Anyone out there with a better grounding in Catholic moral theology wanting to explain to me how using contraception is somehow a worse sin than fornication or adultery? How someone can still consider himself "a good Catholic" while still getting some non-marital or extra-marital nookie, as long as s/he doesn't use the dreaded contraceptives? Last I remember looking into the matter, all of those acts were considered pretty damn grave sins. So it seems to me, as long as you're going to go ahead and commit fornication/adultery, you should at least be rational about it, and use a contraceptive as well. Because, as I remember it, if you die after the act of fornication/adultery, I'm not convinced that your deciding not to use a contraceptive is enough of a factor in mitigation to save you from the fires of Hell.

Or am I just full of shit again?

These are the thoughts that kept me out of the really good schools
--George Carlin


Len on 07.17.05 @ 05:27 PM CST



[ | ]

July 2005
SMTWTFS
     12
3456789
10111213141516
17181920212223
24252627282930
31      



Home
Archives
Archives of Blogger site
Archives: May '04-Feb '05
Archives: Feb-March '05



RSS 1.0 FEED
Powered by gm-rss

Len's sidebar:
About Len (The uncondensed version)
Memorial to a dear friend
Frederick W. Benteen
The Web of Leonards
The St. Louis Cardinals
The Memphis Redbirds
The St. Louis Browns
The Birdwatch
Hey! Spring of Trivia Blog
BlogMemphis (The Commercial Appeal's listing of Memphis blogs)
The Guide to Life, the Universe, and Everything
George Dubya Bush Blows
Taking the Fight to Karl
Kraftwerk: Chicago, 6/4/2005
My Chicago: Part One
My Chicago, Part Two
Millennium Park
Miscellaneous Chicago
Busch Stadium Tour and BoSox/Cards Game: 6/6/2005
St. Louis Cardinals Hall of Fame Museum

Len's extended blogroll:

Brock's Sidebar:
About Brock
The Agitator
Agoraphilia
apostropher
Boing Boing
Brad DeLong
Crooked Timber
The Decembrist
Dispatches from the Culture Wars
Fafblog
Flypaper Theory
Heretical Ideas
John and Belle Have a Blog
Jon Rowe
Julie Saltman
The Language Guy
Literal Minded
Majikthise
Marginal Revolution
Matthew Yglesias
Oliver Willis
Orin Kerr
Pandagon
Pharyngula
Political Animal
Positive Liberty
Signifying Nothing
Unfogged
Unqualified Offerings

Karen's Sidebar
About Karen
The Ig-Nobel Prizes
The Annals of Improbable Research
The Darwin Awards
EBaums World
Real Clear Politics
U.S. News Wire
Foreign Affairs
The Capitol Steps
Overlawyered
Engrish
Legal Affairs
Nobel Laureates for Change
Program On International Policy
Law of War
Sunday Times
Media Matters
Fafblog
Is That Legal?
Discourse
Andrew Sullivan
Evolutionblog
Literal Minded
Jon Rowe
Dysblog
Freespace Blog
Thought Not
Publius Pundit
Maddox
Blog Maverick
Rosenberg Blog
Crooked Timber
GreeneSpace
EdCone.com
Conglomerate
McSweeney's

The Rocky Top Brigade:


Rocky Top Brigade Sampler


A New Memphis Mafia


The liberal alternative to Drudge.

Get Firefox!




Take the MIT Weblog Survey

Len supports:
Operation Yellow Elephant:


"Because ranting is safer than enlisting"
Operation Yellow Elephant Blog

The Rebel Alliance of Yankee Haters
Blue Squadron (NL)
Babalu (Marlins)
Leaning Toward the Dark Side (Mets)
Ramblings' Journal (Cubs)
Mediocre Fred (Brewers)
Len Cleavelin (Cardinals)
Red Squadron (AL)
Obscurorama (Red Sox)
Frinklin Speaks (Mariners)
Steve Silver (Twins)
Steve the Llama Butcher (Red Sox)
Rob the Llama Butcher (Rangers)
MoatesArt (Red Sox)
Rammer (Tigers)
JawsBlog (Indians)
Ubi Libertas (Blue Jays)
Oldsmoblogger (Indians)
Mass Backwards (Red Sox)
Unassigned
Industrial Blog
Cry Freedom



How many visitors are here:


Blogrings/Blog indexes/Blog search:
« ? Verbosity # »


Listed on Blogwise
Blogarama - The Blog Directory
Popdex
Popdex Citations
Technorati
Blog Search Engine



Greymatter Forums Weblog Commenting and Trackback by HaloScan.com
template by linear